So my 'baby' turned 14 this month!
So here we are remembering how I was when Joe was born....22, newly married, just left the forces, thinking how did I end up here! So at 22 I had no idea what to expect or how I was going to manage as a new wife and new mum, the thought of it just terrified me if I am totally honest.
I met Mark on my last 6 weeks in the Falkland Islands! not planned let me tell you.....I was planning to leave the forces in the April (met Mark in the Aug before) and go and do some travelling....I remember Mum saying that you should do some in your life as you may regret it later! how right was she! not that I would ever tell her that of course!!! :D
So after returning from the Falklands my life then turned in to a roller coaster.....found out I was pregnant on my leave......told Mark! which went better than I thought it would down a phone! he wasn't due back til Nov and I really couldn't leave it that long! then first week of December he proposed, then 30th December we got married! Jan 97 we moved in to our first home together....Mark was away on exercise & I was 4 months pregnant! Mad I know! I still had 3 months to go before I would be leaving the forces, but Joe had other ideas!! I was signed off sick til I left as I had a rough pregnancy.....little did I know then I was having a ready made 3 month old!
So here we were in May and his due date came and went! Huge looking like I was having twins I went in to Salisbury hospital on 31st May, 10 days over his due date I got enduced.....wow, that was an experience!
3 and a half days later!!!!! Joe was born by emergency c-section, I was so scared as I was awake! I tried to stay calm but when they told me he was stuck I worried....a lot!
So at 3am on 3rd June 1996 out came Joe....58 cm long & 10lb 10oz!!!! he was a BIG baby!
The nurses were soo lovely and loved to hold him and let me sleep as I needed a blood transfusion after as he took sooo much goodness from me.
He was gorgeous (of course he still is!); my 'little' man.......always quicker than other kids his age doing things, always interested in lots of more advance stuff....of course I thought it was 'normal' as I didn't know any different.......So jump ahead to this year, Jan 2010 Joe is diagnosed with ASD!
So that explains lots of things, but also fills me with fear....what! what is this thing he has? how do I cope with this? am I alone here or is this something other people deal with? are all ASD kids the same?
These were just some questions that I had
Now in June 2010 I realise that he is special as he is different but sooo intelligent, advanced yet still a child, challenging but rewarding. I am learning so much about this condition that I look at things differently. I won't lie it is really hard to know what is best still, but I am working on it.
Joe is now 14, size 11 (men size) feet, 5'10 inches tall!!!! blonde & blue eyed (heartbreaker in the making!!)
I love you Joe, good, bad and ugly times, but you are you and unique
I am so proud of who you are and who you want to become xxxx
Sunday, 6 June 2010
Can't Believe it's June Already!!!
So here we are halfway through the year already! How scary!
So for the first time I have been struggling really badly with life! my grasp on reality seemed to have escaped me recently and things got too much. I ran away! at my age! well not really ran away but escaped to Devon as I couldn't face anything. Things were just too much.
I don't like the feeling of loss of control as it means that the family mechanics break down.....it seems that I have to 'keep it together' so that Mark doesn't fall apart! How unfair is that! I can't breakdown without consequence!
I gave some home truths when I got back, some I wasn't planning to do, but in anger and frustration they just came out. So now I feel a bit more relieved as I wasn't planning to blurt out what I did, but hey it needed to be said so now I am feeling better.
So here is the plan......
1. Move out the house and sell
2. Seek therapy!
3. Structure and routine to the household
4. Major de-clutter (sell stuff, donate stuff, bin stuff)
5. Fix broken doors
6. HAVE A HOLIDAY!
Well the last one is going to be needed after everything!
So here is my thought.....
Don't let life get you down, don't let the things in your head build up so that it gets too much. Always share what is going on otherwise you will struggle more in the long run
Think positive even when life is getting too much, all these things are meant to happen so that we can learn and grow from them
So for the first time I have been struggling really badly with life! my grasp on reality seemed to have escaped me recently and things got too much. I ran away! at my age! well not really ran away but escaped to Devon as I couldn't face anything. Things were just too much.
I don't like the feeling of loss of control as it means that the family mechanics break down.....it seems that I have to 'keep it together' so that Mark doesn't fall apart! How unfair is that! I can't breakdown without consequence!
I gave some home truths when I got back, some I wasn't planning to do, but in anger and frustration they just came out. So now I feel a bit more relieved as I wasn't planning to blurt out what I did, but hey it needed to be said so now I am feeling better.
So here is the plan......
1. Move out the house and sell
2. Seek therapy!
3. Structure and routine to the household
4. Major de-clutter (sell stuff, donate stuff, bin stuff)
5. Fix broken doors
6. HAVE A HOLIDAY!
Well the last one is going to be needed after everything!
So here is my thought.....
Don't let life get you down, don't let the things in your head build up so that it gets too much. Always share what is going on otherwise you will struggle more in the long run
Think positive even when life is getting too much, all these things are meant to happen so that we can learn and grow from them
Sunday, 9 May 2010
Wow is Ben 1 Already!
So here we are on May 9th and Ben has been one now for 10 days!
I can't believe how quick his first year has gone. He has done soo much with still lots to learn over the next few years.
He got lots for his birthday so thanks for all the pressies and took 2 days to open them! But hey, enjoy that part while it lasts as they get too carried away when they get older.
He wasn't sure about birthday cake though! bless him, I got some great pics though so will endeavour to scrap those soon enough
Since his birthday he seems to have grown up quite a bit, as he is now pulling himself up, saying Mama ALL the time, knows when he is hungry and when he just wants a cuddle. He is trying to walk so we are practising with him, but he is crawling round really fast so not really bothered about him walking just yet....after all each baby is different, Joe walked at 7 & a half months, Sam at 14 months, Tim at 8 months....so don't mind, it is down to him, it is when he feels ready.
His hair is going really curly now at the back which is soooo cute! It is also a strawberry blonde colour at the min, but I am sure that will change soon enough.
He makes me laugh as he loves kisses, raspberries being blown on his mouth & tummy and giggles alot. He is soooo well natured that it is precious
Ben belated Happy Birthday, Lots of Love, hugs, Kisses & eskimoes Mummy xxxxx
I can't believe how quick his first year has gone. He has done soo much with still lots to learn over the next few years.
He got lots for his birthday so thanks for all the pressies and took 2 days to open them! But hey, enjoy that part while it lasts as they get too carried away when they get older.
He wasn't sure about birthday cake though! bless him, I got some great pics though so will endeavour to scrap those soon enough
Since his birthday he seems to have grown up quite a bit, as he is now pulling himself up, saying Mama ALL the time, knows when he is hungry and when he just wants a cuddle. He is trying to walk so we are practising with him, but he is crawling round really fast so not really bothered about him walking just yet....after all each baby is different, Joe walked at 7 & a half months, Sam at 14 months, Tim at 8 months....so don't mind, it is down to him, it is when he feels ready.
His hair is going really curly now at the back which is soooo cute! It is also a strawberry blonde colour at the min, but I am sure that will change soon enough.
He makes me laugh as he loves kisses, raspberries being blown on his mouth & tummy and giggles alot. He is soooo well natured that it is precious
Ben belated Happy Birthday, Lots of Love, hugs, Kisses & eskimoes Mummy xxxxx
Friday, 16 April 2010
Things are on the up!
So it has been a little while since I 'blogged' and things have definately been improving. May be it is my state of mind as I have started to think more positive as negative thoughts were definately not working.
I was weighed at Slimming World 2 weeks ago and felt disappointed in myself as I was again only 2 pounds under the weight from when I started with them 10 months ago, which made me feel really low. So I got a kick up the bum that night I will tell you. I have now with my crafty head on have created my own food diary and have been filling it in, warts and all for the past week and last night I was weighed again.....I will be honest I really wasn't sure how I would do, but I knew that I had been pretty good......
I LOST 7 & A HALF POUNDS!!!!!
I was completely gobsmacked, I stepped off the scales twice as I didn't believe what I was reading on the reader! I was in complete shock as I never expected to have lost that amount in a single week!
So here I am now half a stone lighter! thinking that this is it. I have signed up to do a fitness camp starting next week, so I am looking forward to that as I am of the opinion that you can lose all the weight under the sun, but if you don't work out it won't work. So I am looking to get healthy and fit. I will post a before pic soon once I have loaded the pics onto my pc.
On another note, the home life is improving, we now make sure that we have most meals around the table which the kids are getting used to as I feel that we can talk and laugh with each other and working on the family unit is important. The boys are getting better too around the table as it is structure and consistency.
I will admit that half term has been hard work, but no where near as bad as it is has been in the past. Maybe it's because we have been talking more as a family and trying to work together on compromises.
Joe is getting there with the outbursts that he has been having as I am trying to sort things out that we can work on controlling them better after we had a huge one recently causing a lot of damage to doors in the house. He has learned from that he needs to calm down and remove himself from the situation at hand, which the outburst after the 'damaging' one was better handled.
Sam has been struggling, I am trying to support and working with him which is proving challenging. He is acting out for some reason, reasons that he will not tell us. We will get the bottom of it though. May be it is just becoming a teenager, he is probably confused about what is going on.
So I said things were looking up and they are. I have 2 interviews next week for jobs, one of them is a second interview for a contract role based locally and the other means a re-location but is a permanent role. Personally I think I would prefer the contract role as it will help us to get on top of the money situation. Any way we will just have to see what happens.
TTFN and here's to things going well for longer!
I was weighed at Slimming World 2 weeks ago and felt disappointed in myself as I was again only 2 pounds under the weight from when I started with them 10 months ago, which made me feel really low. So I got a kick up the bum that night I will tell you. I have now with my crafty head on have created my own food diary and have been filling it in, warts and all for the past week and last night I was weighed again.....I will be honest I really wasn't sure how I would do, but I knew that I had been pretty good......
I LOST 7 & A HALF POUNDS!!!!!
I was completely gobsmacked, I stepped off the scales twice as I didn't believe what I was reading on the reader! I was in complete shock as I never expected to have lost that amount in a single week!
So here I am now half a stone lighter! thinking that this is it. I have signed up to do a fitness camp starting next week, so I am looking forward to that as I am of the opinion that you can lose all the weight under the sun, but if you don't work out it won't work. So I am looking to get healthy and fit. I will post a before pic soon once I have loaded the pics onto my pc.
On another note, the home life is improving, we now make sure that we have most meals around the table which the kids are getting used to as I feel that we can talk and laugh with each other and working on the family unit is important. The boys are getting better too around the table as it is structure and consistency.
I will admit that half term has been hard work, but no where near as bad as it is has been in the past. Maybe it's because we have been talking more as a family and trying to work together on compromises.
Joe is getting there with the outbursts that he has been having as I am trying to sort things out that we can work on controlling them better after we had a huge one recently causing a lot of damage to doors in the house. He has learned from that he needs to calm down and remove himself from the situation at hand, which the outburst after the 'damaging' one was better handled.
Sam has been struggling, I am trying to support and working with him which is proving challenging. He is acting out for some reason, reasons that he will not tell us. We will get the bottom of it though. May be it is just becoming a teenager, he is probably confused about what is going on.
So I said things were looking up and they are. I have 2 interviews next week for jobs, one of them is a second interview for a contract role based locally and the other means a re-location but is a permanent role. Personally I think I would prefer the contract role as it will help us to get on top of the money situation. Any way we will just have to see what happens.
TTFN and here's to things going well for longer!
Friday, 9 April 2010
New day, new start
Well be a bit rough recently in the Maylam household......
1. Mark's been made redundant! His was the job we thought would be the secure one!
2. Joe caused £1000 damage to the house when he had an 'autistic outburst' last week
3. Tim is acting up & getting agressive
4. Panicking about mortgage payments due to Mark's redundancy
5. I AM NEARLY BACK UP TO THE SAME WEIGHT AS WHEN I STARTED SW LAST JUNE!!!!!!!
I have decided that today 9th April is going to be a new start & I am looking to focus more positive. I have decided to start doing a fitness bootcamp to try & give me a kick up the bum with regards to my fitness. I don't want to go to Zoe's wedding in June looking like a ten ton heffer! (that's how I am feeling at the min). Things have been sooo stressful over the past few months that I have forgotten to look after myself as I have been concerntrating on everyone else, forgetting that I should look after myself first. I heard a quote recently on Oprah 'if you were on a plane & the oxygen masks came down, would you do your's first or everyone elses?'
I am no good to the kids if I am not healthy & fit so here is to a new focused me! (I hope)
1. Mark's been made redundant! His was the job we thought would be the secure one!
2. Joe caused £1000 damage to the house when he had an 'autistic outburst' last week
3. Tim is acting up & getting agressive
4. Panicking about mortgage payments due to Mark's redundancy
5. I AM NEARLY BACK UP TO THE SAME WEIGHT AS WHEN I STARTED SW LAST JUNE!!!!!!!
I have decided that today 9th April is going to be a new start & I am looking to focus more positive. I have decided to start doing a fitness bootcamp to try & give me a kick up the bum with regards to my fitness. I don't want to go to Zoe's wedding in June looking like a ten ton heffer! (that's how I am feeling at the min). Things have been sooo stressful over the past few months that I have forgotten to look after myself as I have been concerntrating on everyone else, forgetting that I should look after myself first. I heard a quote recently on Oprah 'if you were on a plane & the oxygen masks came down, would you do your's first or everyone elses?'
I am no good to the kids if I am not healthy & fit so here is to a new focused me! (I hope)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
